here's what you have been waiting for?? :)

Its not much but it is back in the saddle....

Chatting to a friend yesterday, who was questioning life, we discovered the following flow...

- What we do affects our lives - our health, our liberty/ freedom, our fulfillment, successes etc

- Our choices/decisions either strengthen or weaken us

-Our attitudes and values determine how we behave and what choices are open to us

- Ultimately our identity (who we believe we are) determines what we choose...

Identity is such a major factor in our lives yet a lot of the time it is subconscious.
We may identify with a brand or a particular band and some of these go hand in hand. We may identify with someone with particular hair, what they wear, what they care about, who they are with or where they hang out. This often gives value or meaning to us.

You may have heard the term 'identify with Christ'. Now i am not one for Jargon or religious language and at times i hear phrases like this or 'may the blood of the lamb be with you' and it means nothing. But for me this whole thing of 'identifying with Christ' has taken on huge meaning in the last 2 years.
I had dreadlocks up until about then and for years felt kinda trapped with this hairstyle, i liked it, but didn't feel i could change it. But as i started to asses my values, to look at who i really was i discovered some new stuff.
To identify with Christ (Jesus, the carpenter from Israel) is odd, but absolutely amazing. What it means is not only that i associate myself with him and what he did, but also take my identity from him. As i have stripped away some of the superficial and fearful things in my life i have begun to find freedom in who i really am. Believing i am created and Loved by a living God.
In practice this means i wear a badge of sorts, i am branded. This doesn't always show on the outside, but it means i am secure in what i am about, why i am here and what i am here for.

i don't suppose many of you will get this totally but... i was a 'Christian' who was supposed to believe this stuff for 14 years before i have really started to get this and i still have a journey to go on.
To identify means to be close to, kind of spend time with or at least have a connection that is pretty constant.
I guess for me also Trust is a huge thing. i have to understand those i identify with, trust their value.

Identity is important to me because it determines where i go next, what i do, if i chose to listen to the values that go with this.

Identifying with something or someone we cant see is scary at times. What if i have it wrong??... Fear is a powerful driver... but i am excited about the mystery, enchanted by the hugeness of the creator and the loving way He interacts with me.

i feel at peace...hope you can find peace in who you are ( i believe you are a loved creation)...

Freshness

Watch This Space.... Freshness coming soon.....

New Thoughts on a tired Thinker

hi all

i am not even sure you will still be looking or even know i still exist, but i am here in my silence. a few things God has been making me aware of latley is my need for stillness and also that i can turn my thinking off at times... so this is kinda what i have been doing.. where my thoughts have raced and i could easily have written on 'dehumanisation' or 'fresh expressions of church' or 'why doesnt God listen to us' etc i have decided to relax a while with my thoughts and give myself a chance to catch up. I am currently reading 'The Power of Now'. A very spiritual and deep book about human insessant thinking and the need to find the person underneath the mind. I am in a process of 'observing my thinker' to see what i make of him.. and i when i decide i will let you know. what i am aware of is that 'I' dont always agree with 'myself'. 'I' can be very negative and narrow and impatient and maybe that is not me, but a conditioned me that needs some working with?? like i said i will let you know... maybe watch yours.. dont be critical, just watch.. apparently a gap will appear and in that gap a chance for peace may come. i have enjoyed switching my mind off now and again. Learning to control it, rather than it dominating me.

well i am off to Mozambique for 3 weeks with the lovley Jodun ( in fact she is already there suning herself for the past 2 weeks) i have to find her and catch up fast.. hope to see some of you over the festive season..

Grace and peace

Michael

Sunday Sermon

So I want to talk today about connecting

Readings - Jeremiah 23 vs 1-6 , Ephesians 2 vs 11-22, Mark 6 vs 30-34 (look up on google for ease sake :)
Todays readings are all been about tending, rleating and helping those out there. Massively tired and hungry with only 5 loaves between 12 or more already waiting ages to eat and sleep, Jesus pushes further.

In jeremiah the call to care for people and not scare them off.

In Ephesians the reminder of the outsiders (Gentiles) who are now welcome, breaking down the barriers and walls between us in here and them out there.

As you will know I work in the night scene of Bomo. Every weekend we walk the streets and chat with people offering support kindness and service with no strings attached.

We met a girl out the other week who at first didn’t want to talk. She asked if we were gonna try and convert her, she said we wouldn’t like her because she was BAD. . Before long she opened up and shared that she gave herself to a lot of guys. I asked why and it transpired that she didn’t like herself very much and didn’t value herself. She felt alone and it was a way of her feeling a connection. She ended up writing a prayer card saying sorry for some horrible things she had done wrong.

In the book….
sex God…Rob Bell says

‘we struggle with connection in the earth and connection with others and with ourselves… we feel connected with people we are having experiences with.’

Why are people escaping so much into alcohol, drugs and sex. I am not going to talk about that too much today but more the underlying fundamental reasons as I think they relate to us too.

Feeling disconnected is something we all feel daily as part of the fall of mankind. Disconnection happened in the Garden of Eden. The sense of shame hiding and loneliness.
Fear of vulnerability being open with others…
To get back to nakedness we have to go in reverse… have to overcome shame..

We tell ourselves we are not good enough, not holy enough, God qulaifies us we dont have to come perfect...

Deeper disconnection in us leads to a deeper need to express things to others, this can be immensely damaging and comes out in all kinds of behaviour.

Whether a
‘Concert, church service or rally… its about the moment of connection …that is our natural state.’ Being together, being connected.

This is what I feel in a Night club with others

What are the Barriers to intimacy and connection??

Disconnected with ourselves… and God

I think in my life and role lately I have been feeling very busy and even overwhelmed at times. This has led to a feeling of isolation even in my close relationships.

Busyness is an evil because it moves us away from peace with God. We focus so much on something that we lose sight of the moment. We can only stay connected if we remain in the moment. (Doesnt mean life cant be full, but not controlling us and distracting us from whats important).

I Started doing Yoga and Pilates the past two weeks as I cant find time or discipline myself to stop and relax.

That disconnection leads me to be disconnected to God.

Mark 6 v 30-34 - 'Come away to deserted place and rest a while'… Jesus acknowledges the need for escape and rest.

But I guess he also says our primary concern is connection with each other and God. Shutting others out is not something he ever advocates no matter how tired/stressed we are. How many of us shut others out when we feel tired???

Staying connected to others is what God has called us to. Living in common unity together.



So How do we reconnect???

Sometimes it takes one person or one moment to respond in a certain way. Like if one wants to strip and run into the sea… someones gotta do it first…be bold take the plunge kinda moment… sometimes discipline of...

Stopping to find rest, change of pace.

With others it may take a change in Perceived difference (circumcision group in ephesians) change our attitudes not shut people out.
Jesus came to reunite people to each other and God…

I cant say it better than Jesus so …
Connecting
John 15

1Jesus said to his disciples:

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2He cuts away every branch of mine that doesn't produce fruit. But he trims clean every branch that does produce fruit, so that it will produce even more fruit. 3You are already clean because of what I have said to you.

4Stay joined to me, and I will stay joined to you. Just as a branch cannot produce fruit unless it stays joined to the vine, you cannot produce fruit unless you stay joined to me. 5I am the vine, and you are the branches. If you stay joined to me, and I stay joined to you, then you will produce lots of fruit. But you cannot do anything without me. 6If you don't stay joined to me, you will be thrown away. You will be like dry branches that are gathered up and burned in a fire.

7Stay joined to me and let my teachings become part of you. Then you can pray for whatever you want, and your prayer will be answered. 8When you become fruitful disciples of mine, my Father will be honoured. 9I have loved you, just as my Father has loved me. So remain faithful to my love for you. 10If you obey me, I will keep loving you, just as my Father keeps loving me, because I have obeyed him.

11I have told you this to make you as completely happy as I am. 12Now I tell you to love each other, as I have loved you. 13The greatest way to show love for friends is to die for them. 14And you are my friends, if you obey me. 15Servants don't know what their master is doing, and so I don't speak to you as my servants. I speak to you as my friends, and I have told you everything that my Father has told me.

16You did not choose me. I chose you and sent you out to produce fruit, the kind of fruit that will last. Then my Father will give you whatever you ask for in my name. [a] 17So I command you to love each other.


Sex God…

‘You cant be connected to God until you are at peace with who you are. If you are still upset that God gave you this life this body or this family or these circumstances you will never be able to connect with God in a healthy thriving or sustainable sort of way, you will be at odds with your maker. If you cant come to terms with who you are and the life you have been given you will never be able to accept others and how they were made and the lives they have been given. Until you are at peace with God and those around you will continue to struggle with your role on the planet your part to play in the ongoing creation of the universe. You will continue to struggle and resist and fail to connect. ‘

If you have a good relationship with God you can connect with others easily.

Point 1. we need to connect with God each other and the world
Point 2- we need to make space for this to happen, distractions rob us of this.
Point 3- we cant do anything worthwhile unless we are connected to God and each other.

Poem- Walls….

The walls are coming down,
Sometimes they crumble,
Sometimes they tumble,
sometimes brick by brick they descend
Time needed, time taken
Exposed to the elements,
Their value found in their vulnerability,
Deconstruction leads to reconstruction
A clearer view to be had, of simplicity, purity and truth
The walls are coming down as the sun rises illuminating proof.

By Jodun Dunseath (my clever and beautiful girlfriend)

Prayer

Lord God it is easy for us to judge each other and more so those that don’t know you. Merciful God know that in our weakness we search for ways to reconnect. Help us to find healthy ways to connect and remain joined with you and each other. Thanks.

Pink

HI
Please don't give up on me because i am so slack at writing.. often i am having thoughts but not just wanting to use this as a spewing site for my mind.. want to write things that maybe helpful to others so want to think them through, so here goes with the latest....

I am glad my life is full of colour. recently i have been aware that i have been drawn to the colour pink. Not the baby pink but more the dusky dark pink variety. I am aware it is quite a fashion colour for guys this year and i have recently purchased some items. Jodun has just had a birthday party in London with the theme 'Express yourself'. I fully intended to wear a pink outfit but... i had a conversation with a counsellor guy that i see. i told him of this intended expression and he asked me to think if it was about anything. As we discussed this i thought it probably had something to do with my masculinity. I then realised that day i was fully clothed in Khaki and had been dressing in that way for the past few days, certainly a stereotypical masculine/feminine contrast. He told me to sit there and ask God what that was about. At that moment the phone rang.. it was Joduns mother.. we chatted for a moment and then she asked if i could do her a favour. She said could i buy Jodun some flowers from her.” Of course” i said, what type and colour?? “Pink...well actually cerise kind of dark pink.....” I found this highly amusing in light of the current conversation. I had been to get a drink and after the conversation realised it was with a pink innocent smoothie with a khaki wrapper. i commented on my probable subconcious choice of drink after. I then noticed the label on the smoothie wrapper, it read something along the lines of ...getting life in balance is important and how we are often trying to perform and worry about it, we just need to put the good things in and the bad will take care of itself …. 'i am off to see a bearded lady about a trampoline' how much of a masculine/feminine statement is that. :) Just to say at the party i wore a stark contrast of pink and khaki.
Tonight i went out on the streets of Bournemouth to do chaplaincy work. I went out with other volunteers to look for people to help. Tonight was very different from usual. We didnt really help anyone. Instead we spent the whole evening just having really nice chats with door staff and people in the street. I have been really wanting to slow down latley and concentrate on relationships, tonight that seemed to happen. The last person we encountered was a girl who had no shoes. We offered some slippers, which were recieved gratefully. As she sat on the floor to put them on she exclaimed'”they are pink” i replied in jest '”well no, more cerise i think” I said this as i had the whole pink clothes thing in mind.
She asked if we could shout for her sister down the road. We obliged and called her sister over, and had a little chat with her explaining who we were , her sister seemed keen to volunteer with us so we got some details.. the slipper girl was getting aggitated and wanted to go and get some food.... sis then said "shut up Cerise" i did an audio double take !! "what did you say?? whats your sisters name?" i asked. "Cerise" she said!!!!!!!
What are the chances of that?!!! Me saying the word cerise to Cerise putting on her 'PINK slippers!!! The sceptic in me says maybe i heard this word being said and subconciousley repeated it... but on relfection i am 99.9% certain that didnt happen and that in fact it was Gods crazy sense of humour. That he planted that in my mind in the ongoing comedy of my pink journey...
As I was talking about this to Jodun I asked her what she thought of the incident that happened, she asid she wasn’t sure, but let let out a loud laugh… she told me a guy had just walked past her with bright pink hair!!!! She then walked past a guy in pink trainers, he was on the phone and the on rhing she heard was him saying yeah I can wear pink shoes….!!! I then phoned my mother and she thought it was all funny as they had a had a chat in the garden with a few guys about whether they would wear pink or not. Maybe this pink thing is something men need to address… are we being imasculinated? I certainly wonder about the pressure on us to perform and be a certain way. What we are supposed to be like and how we are to act. How sex has become a way of showing manhood and how we are all dehumanised in that process.

Did you know that in Victorian times Pink was a mans colour and baby boys, not girls were dressed in it.
http://www.songdog.net/blog/archives/000994.html

Pace

so, you have probably stopped looking at my blog by now because i am so slack at writing it. well here is what i think the reason is. i have become too busy!!! it has happened before and it will probably happen again. but when i get too busy a lot of important things get missed. The first being people and friends.. you i would say are friends and i have been neglecting you.

There have been some exciting things happening, the street work in Bournemouth is great, i manage to get 4 volunteers out every saturday now, which is rewarding, i am developing more team with that at looking at rebranding, training, working with the police more, and recruiting. I have set up a task group to help me, gaining prayer support and generally getting to know more people. i am now djing monthly for a night called Static run by local guys. I am seeting up sunday sessions to dj and watch the sunset each week through July and August at a beach front bar called Aruba. I am booking dj's and helping organise a big summer ball on the pier on 25th July.
I am involved in a snowboard tour and djing in leeds at an indoor snowboard centre in August, i have been seeing Jodun ( amazing girlfriend) most weeks in london, i have been hanging out and dancing with a bunch of great guys who are in recovery from drugs and aclohol and building support and community with them, also weekly , street dancing on a monday and a veggie mondays meal, circuits classes tuesday, spanish lessons and salsa class on a wednesday, meetings with a home/planning group on thursday and the odd surf here or there.

i am now taking 10 days off to see my sis Anna in Cyrpus and taking Jodun with me :) think i need a break.
As Matrin luther King was quoted ' i am so busy i need to spend an extra hour a day in prayer'!!!!

how true, slowing down is healthier, more sociable, more benificial to all around us and helps us BE . i wana get my value in who i am not what i do.

i have written this, to inform you to inform me when i am not in touch that i need to slow down more...

God's Speed
Michael x